In my last post I explained my concern that we need to change the culture for parents to ask for help and parenting support because they feel stigmatised, failures and disempowered, albeit by well meaning professionals. The problem has been built up over a number of Governments, who have been supporting families. Professionals have been perceived, in my experience, by many parents as looking down on them because they have the knowledge to tell them what to do to ‘fix’ them or their families.
I am not against anything that supports parents for the fantastic job they do, because, lets face it, they have enough problems trying to be the best parent they can be for their children. The challenge for professionals is they are starting from a place of having both hands tied behind their backs, the feelings and the perception of parents. And it seems they are not aware of the negative energy they are transmitting.
Parents know when they are happy their children are happy because children are sensitive to their parents’ physical and emotional state. Children can read parents like a book; the parents know this, but may not be aware of how to manage their emotional state. Which is not surprising because parents and grandparents have not been taught emotional literacy – which is why the UK is in such a mess, but that’s another story!
The parents sense this same negative energy when they come into contact with a professional trained to support them. This is not the start of a respectful and trusting environment for a parent to want to seek help, let alone share some intimate secrets or even spend any longer with that professional, than they have to.
We start from a different place.
We see all our clients as magnificent and capable of achieving their potential. We are seen as non-judgemental and respectful. We are highly trained specialists who have done a great deal of personal development work on ourselves first. This is part of our life we are not just doing a job, parents sense we are authentic and work with integrity. We have a simple parenting programme that builds on their innate abilities. We don’t tell them what to do but help connect them to their instincts and build their emotional resilience. They then have the confidence, tools and techniques to support their whole family, to change their parent child communication and create generational sustainability.